A couple of weeks ago I started off my Auntie Adventure tales with a story about how Cole, my nine year old nephew, stalked met some Calabrese women on the lungomare in Catanzaro. Unfortunately (for me) it didn’t stop there.
You see, I’m convinced there really is something to that Aria Calabra that changes a once innocent, well-meaning, pooch-petting boy into a hormone-ranging mostro.
And it all started in Pizzo.
Auntie Adventures: Italian Beach Bums
Pizzo is one of my favorite little villages in Calabria and since it is only 45-minutes or so from Catanzaro, it made for a sensible day trip. We headed out-on the train … more on that later-to check out the Murat Castle, go swimming in the Tyhennian Sea and taste-test tartufo in Pizzo’s main piazza.
And all went according to plan.
We toured the castle, I forced a picture of Cole and a statue, we had tartufo.
Then we went to the beach. In fact, we found an ideal cove of tan sand and rocks, just large enough for a few people and their beach towels, and plopped down to enjoy a few hours of private beach bummin’,
The boys had a great time and just before I called “time’s up,” they swam around the big boulder to my right-to another hidden bay of private beach bliss and had the surprise of their young lives.
A topless sunbather.
I looked up and saw Cole, stumbling towards me in a drunken stupor, wide eyes, goofy grin.
“Cici!” He said. (See, he is still a kid-he calls me by a special name.) “You’ll never guess what we saw. A woman without her bra!”
I jumped up. “Ok, boys. Time to go. We’ll miss the train … Come on. Andiamo!”
They reluctantly joined me and immediately started sizing her up.
“They were so big,” Cole said. “I gotta call Uncle Peppe!”
“They weren’t that big,” the older and wiser 14 year old, Jake told him. “She was probably a ‘C’.”
“They were big,” Cole insisted. “And there were like, nipples or something.”
“Enough, boys! Basta.” I had to stop it. I flashed back to October 17, 2000-just seconds after he was born-it was too soon to be hearing about nipples.
We hopped on the train and an hour or so later we were back in Catanzaro-the boys wearing a bit more pride on their upturned chests, Cole, with a glimmer of knowledge that shouldn’t be there, shining in his deep green eyes and me, with all of the stress and worry of an aunt who’d just allowed her sister’s nine year old child to grow up a bit too soon.
But all’s well that ends well. My sister laughed and forgave me, Cole thinks I’m the coolest aunt in the country and I’ve learned there is a lot more to beach bums than should ever meet the eye.
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LOL! Little boys grow up too fast, don’t they? 🙂
(tear, tear) Yes, they do!
Hahahaha, this is absolutely hilarious!!!
Yea, yea … NOW it is. 😉
That’s a great one Cherrye! Hopefully your nephews will have a slightly more balanced approach to nudity than most Americans.
Well, I don’t know, the boys were fairly excited, so … .
Certo………you are the coolest aunt in Italy……..since I’m in the US. ROFL
Si, si … certo.
Cherrye, the hung up one is YOU! Let them watch a little Italian teevoo and soon they can go to medical school and skip the anatomy part.
Ha, I know … we took them to dinner and they couldn’t even eat because of the shows they were watching in the restaurant. Talk about culture shock! 🙂
Histerical! Thank you for making my day… 😉
Glad to help, Peter! lol
love it…… you guys are having fun…. miss you
xx
Miss you, too. Wish you had been here this month!
” . . . or something.”
Hilarious!
I know … *soooo* cute!
Ha ha!! welcome to Europe boys! Love Pizzo… one of my favorites too Cherrye although I enjoyed Caminia last week as well. One of these trips we are going to have to meet up for coffee!
Definitely. Hope you had fun at Caminia. The weather is fabulous this week-hope you were here during that time!
That was truly funny! Boys will be boys…. and they all like ta-tas! 🙂
So I’ve heard. 🙂
OMG! Hi! We have an apartment in Pizzo. 300 meters from the sea. We love it down there! Love reading your blog. First travelled to Rome in 1974 and I can’t help but smile and agree with your observations about the Italians…so true about the “draft”!!! Also, last summer I saw a young woman in Sardinia wearing a tank top, short-shorts, sandals and to complete her outfit, a long scarf wrapped several times around her neck!!! Too funny! Keep writing! Brava!
Ha, funny. Thanks for the comment. I’m sure Cole will want to look you up next time he’s in Pizzo!
Superb. My thanks for posting this. I will definitely come here to see what’s new and inform my people about it.