Oh, how I TRY to keep this place upbeat and positive (I am speaking of the blog, of course), but sometimes you have a really crappy day – or, your husband does – and you need to share. And, sometimes…just sometimes…that crap won’t fit into one blog post. So, here you have…
In order to understand the full gravity of the day, I need to fill you in on a few things I’ve failed to mention over the last couple of weeks.
2) I didn’t want to boast (after Erin’s Questura adventure) but I went to the police headquarters, gave my fingerprints, and was in and out in less than 20 minutes. A few days later they called and said I needed to return.
3) Peppe went to the Comune di Catanzaro to get an “official” copy of our marriage license (to give the Questura). Upon returning home, he noticed a misprint.
4) When we began rebuilding Il Cedro, we followed the rules to a “T,” saved all invoices, and stayed in regular contact with the powers that be so we would qualify for the APT’s “tourism boost” compensation. That was a year and a half ago.
Enter: Last Friday.
Scene I: The Coffee Machine Repair Shop
“Hi. I called twice this week and the owner (your father) said my machine would be ready today.”
Repair-Dude’s Son: “Nooo. Dad didn’t mention it. Let me see… (wait…wait…wait…) Oh, yea. He has to order a part. We’re not sure when it will be ready. You never know with the post…”
“Well, I need it for my business…”
Repair-Dude: “It’s for a business? OH!!! Then, it isn’t covered on warranty…Sorry!”
Scene II: The Questura in Catanzaro
“Hi. Someone called and said my wife needed to come back here. Do you know why?”
Questura Lady: “No, it is ok. She called us and said she had already completed the process, we told her what to do.”
Questura Lady: “Yes, sir. I have it right here. (She holds up a piece of paper.) Your wife called this week and talked to us.”
“No, ma’am. My wife didn’t call you. She barely speaks Italian.” (Thanks for the boost, sweetheart!)
Questura Lady (becoming agitated): “Well, sir. Someone called, are you saying I am lying?”
“I don’t know. Are you? (ouch) And, unless you spoke English with her, it wasn’t my wife, and it wasn’t me. So, what does she need to do?”
Questura Lady: “I already told her what to do.”
Scene III: The Comune di Catanzaro
“Hello, sir. I got this copy last week. It’s my marriage certificate. There’s a mistake.”
Comune Guy: “Mistake?” (He takes the paper.) “Where? I don’t see a mistake!”
“Oh, it is ok. It’s just that my wife wasn’t born in Catanzaro. She was born in America.”
Comune Guy: “Oh. Well. I didn’t do this one.”
(Peppe gives him all relevant birth and marriage information.)
Comune Guy: “Jefferson? It doesn’t exist.”
“Si. It does. Jefferson County.”
Comune Guy: “Oh! I found it. Jefferson C-I-T-Y.”
“Noooo….County. Jefferson County. Jefferson City is in another state!”